Directions

Hi, I'm trying to find my way back to a place that I can't seem to find on the map, can you help me please. 

Sure, do you have an address?

Uh, I don't have an address but I can tell you some things about the area and maybe you would know where it was located from that?

You mean like landmarks and such?

Um, Yeah, kind of like that but it's just some of the things I remember.

Sure, I'll give it a shot.

I remember that it was a really a wonderful place and what I remember the most is that I was always laughing and smiling when I was there. Down the street there was a two lane bridge over a canal that was connected to the intracoastal waterway where a dolphin would hang out sometimes and all the kids would go down and swim with him. Sometimes he would let you touch him but more often than not he would just swim around you and make dolphin noises. I think he just wanted to play with someone because we never saw any other dolphins around.

Sorry, I don't recall any dolphins or a place like that, do you remember anything else like a town or street name?

I remember that the road in front of our house was made with what was called Shell Rock that was used as a filler instead of gravel in the asphalt and it made the road really sharp on your feet but we didn't care because we still played football barefooted. We played touch tackle, that meant that if you were on the road with the ball we could only touch tackle you but if you ran through the grass between the road and the sidewalk we could tackle you for real so everyone made sure they stayed on the road. I remember we would play all day long and into the darkness until our mother's called us in for the evening.

Well that sounds like a road that could be anywhere.

Yeah, I see what you mean, I guess there would be many roads like that.

Maybe this would help, I remember we didn't have air conditioning in our house and it was always very hot and humid in the summer but we didn't care because we were always playing outside. We would keep watch for the storm clouds in the afternoon and wave at them hoping they would see us and come visit. And when a thunderstorm deemed us worthy and headed in our direction the sky would begin to darken like the night and we would stand still in the middle of the yard with our arms spread wide open towards the sky waiting for that first rush of air. Sometimes it would  rain just a little before the wind came and the raindrops were large, warm, and angry on our faces. When it happened, the storm was upon us before we could catch our breath and it was like someone had opened the sky itself and all the hot air would rush away in an instant and then it was like a freezer door was thrown open and you were embraced by this wonderful cold dry air. We would all yell and dance around in what was like a chilled windstorm created just for us. Sometimes the wind was so cold that the sweat was wiped from our bodies and we would seek shelter from the chilled wind until it passed. Most storms didn't last very long and when they passed it was like we had been recharged and we began to play again with even more vigor. We would then watch all that rain that had fallen into puddles as it begin to evaporate back into the air as soon as the sun came out. You could actually see the rain rise up like shimmering fingers reaching back up into the sky and again it was hot and humid but we didn't care because there were games to be played and other thunderstorms to be welcomed.

I'm sorry, that all seems somewhat familiar but I still can't place where unless I had more information because what you described could be almost anywhere. 

I know, it's strange that I can't seem to remember where this happened but I can remember almost everything else. Like one night when there was a new moon and it was a weekend so we could stay outside late and play. It was so dark it took a while for our eyes to get adjusted to the starlight. Of course the first thing we played was hide and seek until that evolved into hide and scare. While playing we wandered two blocks over to the only street light in the entire neighborhood to take in the wonder of all the insects that had gathered there. This being Florida meant that there were more kinds of insects than you could count. Seemed like a convention of insects had gathered with types I had never seen before and will probably never see again. Some were bigger than my hand and some were so small it looked like they were sand covering the light pole. And they were loud too some of them as they flew by sounded like little helicopters and others you could hear calling out off in the distance. I visited that light pole the next day and there was not one insect to be found and it was like the night before had never happened.

That does sound somewhat familiar but I really don't know where that is. I couldn't even begin to guess what address that could be.

Excuse me, I couldn't help but overhear what you were asking about and I don't think it's a place you're looking for.

How so?

Well first off everything you spoke about is something that happened in the past. 

Yes of course it is, it's memories but I'm trying to find that place, you know the address where those things happened.

I don't think they exist anymore in this world. All those memories existed in their own time and place and trying to find them now would be nearly impossible. All of those stories exist only in your memory and not in the real world, I think they're all gone now.

Oh, I didn't think of that. I used to have photographs too but they are also long gone.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you.

I'm not upset although I'm a little sad now because it's like that song "Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you got till it's gone".  I think I just realized that it is gone, all of it.

Yeah but you still have the memories. 

Not all of them, because there are other stories that are beginning to fade like small birthday candles being extinguished one by one. If I don't remember those stories, did they even happen?

Like the scar on the back of my right hand where I pulled that Sparrow away from a cat. I had cupped my hands together keeping the sparrow safe inside the space while the cat hung on with the claws from both his front feet as he tried to bite his way into my hand. Only by standing up and swinging the cat did he finally let go and I was able to save the Sparrow.

That faded scar on my knuckles still exists and I can still tell the story, but when I'm gone will it be as if the cat, sparrow, and myself never existed? 

I've watched moments where someone tells a dying person that it's okay to let go and that they don't have to hold on any longer. When you finally do let go does it mean that your entire life and all your memories are lost forever?

I think I finally understand what I was looking for, it wasn't a place or an address but a time that is now long gone. I have to wonder if we are all just memories in someone else's mind and once we are forgotten, it would be as if we never existed.